If you feel as though you keep hitting a brick wall in life, then there must be some type of reasoning existing behind the wall. Sometimes circumstances exist to protect you, not to hinder your progress moving forward in life. Where does this protection come from? Perhaps a holy guardian angel, also known as an inner daemon? There is no exact threshold in which this knowing can fully be attained. Sometimes there will exist periods within one’s life, which simply needs to be lived through.
It can be a confining feeling; being locked up within your mind your whole/hole life. There is no escape from the prison of one’s mind. A common place I have seemed to find myself in on a daily basis. There is no shelter in here, only the confining torment of the mind’s tricks and pleasures. A carousel of regrets, self-hatred, and lost opportunities. There is no escape from one’s self. To feel special and unique; this is a daydream only dreamers and deceivers fondle themselves in. I myself am a realist, as I can taste the bloodlust behind closed eyes. I can feel the temptations draining and rotting me from within. This is why I crave the isolation chamber; to keep the beast hidden from within, away from the rest of the world. No one has ever mistaken me for one of those weak-minded or weak-willed sycophants, who constantly need to be validated by complete and total strangers. The only thing worse than that, is being a stranger within one’s own mind.
It is another way for you and I to connect. It is an energy transference, which many of the others cannot differentiate from any other mundane experience. You are unique in this special way. You can see through and beyond it; you can see through all of life’s illusions. As for me, I am the illusion which allows you to see beyond all of the illusions life and myself have to offer you. There is no other way, as there is no escape from me. I have created all of the sensations you have ever experienced through your senses. I know you thought what you experienced was real, but it was another illusion I allowed you to experience. It is that grand spiritual awakening you experienced a couple of years back. Finally, everything within your miserable life was finally making sense to you; even through it really didn’t, you made yourself believe it did. Self-deceit is the worse type of deceit there is. This strictly goes against everything a Satanist such as yourself is supposed to believe in. With the circumstance such as they are in your life currently, it can be easy to get lost on your path. Everyone around you wanting or needing your precious attention, just as everyone in your life is demanding some type of task you need to perform for them. I can only imagine just how tedious all of these directions must in fact be for you. I am sure you will eventually find a way to alleviate this tediousness; eventually severing it completely from your life. It is the undying compulsion within you to express yourself from within, which make the others want and need your attention so demandingly. You know the type; when you are available, they will not require your attention. But when you are enraptured within one of your expressions, and do not have time for anyone or anything else; this is when they will do everything within their power to distract you from your life, just so you will focus your time and energy on them instead of your expression. This is the way most of the insecure others live their lives. One should be extremely cautious and on guard at all times, as to whom they allow into their life, and their body energy field. If one allows another into their life without caution, the results of one’s body energy field becoming contaminated by another’s low vibration, could permanently damage and fragment the tonal frequency of one’s body energy field. There will be times when these others will portray themselves to be something they are not, as these times will be frequent and consistent. These types of others will try their hardest to sneak past your defenses, but mostly they will try to sneak past your intellect in order to manipulate your senses and your integrity. The key word here is ‘try’. These others are weak; weak in body, spirit, mind, and in thought, word, and deed. It can be somewhat amusing to watch these others trying to manipulate you, in order to achieve their selfish intentions. I have always found this to be a strange occurrence; how the weak within society usually think themselves to be of the strongest of their kind around. Such as the case of the feeble-minded, as they think themselves to be of the highest intellect.
This is where you and I depart. You portrayed yourself to be something and someone you are not. Another illusion within your childish confusion. Maturity, depth, and substance, are character traits you are incapable of possessing. What you do not know, and will probably never know. Me. You simply never took the time to peer beyond the hair. The jacket. The personality. The soul. I do not blame you, as it is not your fault. You were groomed to live this kind of life. Your parents, social media, and the propaganda of “Toxic Masculinity” has brainwashed you, along with 95% of the other sheeple within this global society. You cannot seem to find the term in the dictionary. Depth and consideration were never strong character traits within you. A selfish disposition is your body armor. The new normal. The new way of living your life. One. Day. At. A. Time. One childish fantasy at a time. Another death from childhood, which keeps your ideologies fresh and clean. You have been contaminated by everything you have thought was healthy for you. That type of death will slowly and steadily seep into every part of your being. This is why you will never know the depths contained within me.
Words have undercurrents, or undertows you could say. Contained within these underlying depths; this is where the true intentions, the true meaning of that in which is being communicated and inhabits. This is also where the fragmented deaths you have experienced within your life go to live and breathe. Nothing is permanent, as life, and everything contained within it are temporary. Finding peace within yourself (within your words) is the only peace you will find within your waking life.
All we need to do is think for ourselves properly; never allowing external forces to propagandize our thought process. Many “people” within our current civilization, do not have the capacity to properly think for themselves, as they are strangers to the critical thinking aspect of their mentality. For the majority of “people” this aspect of their mentality does not exist. These “people” become confused when they hear words they do not understand; moreover, they become more confused when the definitions of words they use have been suddenly changed. Words are used today, in which their definitions do not belong to them. Change the words and definitions of the “people”; you change the way the “people” think. This is the Control Machine’s undying purpose and goal. To control one’s thought, is to control one’s very own soul.
Returning our mind’s ownership to ourselves, is probably the most important act you will ever endure within this lifetime. The majority of “people” no longer enjoy thinking for themselves, as they prefer to be guided, and ultimately told why, what, and how to think. For the majority of “people”, they no longer see the purpose, or find any type of need to think for themselves. It’s okay, let the Control Machine think for you. By doing so, the Control Machine will comfort you with all of the mental anguish you have always longed for. When one accepts mental laziness, one ultimately accepts mental death within themselves.
Henry Rollins once said, “…all you have is yourself and your mind…” Over the course of my lifetime, I have come to understand just how true that statement is. Self-reliance within itself, is truly the only tangible grasp one can feel within their lives, as one is holding on to their nonconformist ideologies. In case you were wondering, I have never been able to depend on anyone within this lifetime; let alone trust anyone for that matter. All you can trust is one’s nature, and how they will live their life in accordance to their nature. Resourcefulness, nonconformity, volition, and self-reliance are the traits of an individual, who will only know success within their lifetime. Compliance = Death. Not necessarily a physical death, but the death of your consciousness. Remember that.
G.G. Kalfas 