Nestled deeply underneath the crusted layers. Tightly woven in between the soft tissue. Covering the organism’s exoskeleton. Devouring itself from the inside out. Thoroughly maintaining equilibrium. Maintaining true authenticity. It keeps me safe at night. Warm. Protected. Secure. Hiding away from the world. Keeping my authenticity safely hidden. My secret endeavor. My secret life’s work. I am invisible. No one can find me. No one will ever be able to find me. Hiding in plain sight. I need to hide myself more often. I desperately need to protect myself away from those thoughts. All I want is to be left alone and loved at the same time. I want to hide myself away and be seen all at the same time. I am fucked up in this curious way. I will tightly bind and nestle myself into my own womb. My secret chrysalis. I will transform into what I was meant to be. Strong. The urge to KILL burdens my shoulders. If I was given the opportunity to get away with it. There would be no hesitation. NONE. This is why I hide myself away. I know I would thoroughly enjoy it. I would cum all over myself. This is why I hide myself away from the world. I enjoy the smell of necrosis. How many people do you know who could admit that? I hide myself in the deepest and darkest corners of my room. I want to shrink myself, so I can hide more efficiently. Delicately. Compartmentalized efficiency. Necrotic compartmentalized efficiency disorder. I want to be invisible to myself. I will never have to see myself ever again. Each time I look into the mirror I look different. Slightly unrecognizable. I am afraid one day a stranger will appear in front of me. I will be the stranger I see in the mirror. A pleasant surprise. A chance to meet new people. A chance to meet myself. Another part of me. The real me. A hidden part of me. Or simply another delusion contained within me. Is there a difference? I am the difference. The difference between the surface and the subterranean. All of the internal personalities I have become acquainted with during the time I have spent here. Friends for life. Best friends forever. Long lost friends. A passionate embrace within the nothingness. A varied necrotic compartmentalized deficiency disorder. I will keep me safe and protected from myself, and from this necrotic world I currently inhabit. The defiled world I seem to thrive in. I am my only hope. I hope I can count on myself. I better make myself count. This is the only hope I have for any type of mental peace. Who am I kidding? You?
G.G. Kalfas 