Suffocation. A deliberate form of affection. Salvation. Never to be found within your arms. There is nothing tranquil about your glance. A glimpse into the void. A permanent cause to evacuate. Nowhere to go. Escaping myself is an old habit of mine. I cannot keep you happy. I do not have it within me to do so. It is not in my way of living. I am not here to please you or anyone else. Fuck you and everyone else. Some people are just meat sacks with a pulse. Some people deserve to die. Slowly. Perfectly. I have not decided what to do with you yet. I just might add you to the collection in my closet. I just might add you to the collection underneath my house. Slowly with purpose. Perfect in every possible way.
Tag: home
When One Awakens
It is only when one has awakened from their conscious slumber, when they will intuitively come to understand how they have no other choice in life, other than to find themselves within their heart’s desire. When one awakens to who and what they are within themselves, a great responsibility is placed upon them. This is the internal desire, responsibility, and obligation for one to ascend to their higher purpose within this life. For those who are still asleep, and have not awakened; they will remain unaware of this great responsibility living within themselves. For some of the others, they will transition from this realm to the next, without ever knowing this fantastic responsibility within themselves. As long as one remains comfortable within their life, this comfort will maintain their internal ignorance about themselves; moreover, this comfort will inevitably deem self-awareness and self-reliance unnecessary. There are many of the others within this realm, who are completely unaware of the existence of their eternal home. One cannot inform another is has not awakened to themselves; moreover, the security which exists within mind numbing ignorance, is a luxury you and I will never know or experience. The true, purest fundamental essence of one’s heart’s desire and eternal home, is the understanding of the Infernal Consciousness of creation, which exists deep within it. After one awakens to the external world of illusions, and to the fundamental truth within themselves; a numbing effect will shroud one’s body energy field. This numbing effect is a defense mechanism, a protective shield of sorts; protecting the newly awakened one from the toxic and malignant energies, tonalities, and frequencies within the external realm. Once an awakened one has fortified themselves within their body energy field, the numbing effect will dissipate rather quickly; allowing one to instinctively protect themselves against the toxic and malignant external realm. There are many different factors involved, when protecting one’s self from life’s atrocities, which freely roam haphazardly within the external world. When it concerns finding one’s eternal home and heart’s desire, the only place one ever needs to explore is within themselves. I cannot give you specific instructions, as everyone’s eternal home and heart’s desire, is completely different and unique. The only information I can give to you, is the knowing of its existence within yourself. There are so many things which we seek out within the external world. Yet, what we seek within the external, is in actuality contained within ourselves. There are others within this realm, who never quite figure this out. It took me many decades to realize this truth; consequently, it took me the same amount of time to come to the realization and understanding that what I experienced within the external world, was an exact representation of my thoughts, how I felt about myself, and my overall paradigm within my heart. Once I awakened to this infernal truth, my entire life transformed right before my eyes.
Winter’s Breath
Contained within the blowing breeze, the crisp chill of winter’s breath, breathing through the trees, feeling the Earth’s bodily dirt sift itself through my fingers; this is my eternal home. Although, I am well aware that one day, I will not be standing upon the Earth, as I will find myself lying within its womb. Back from which I came. From life to death, from death to life; another life lived, another death relived. I am still the same from one life to the next. Nothing can change my nature, as I possess the same consciousness from one life to the next. Only the circumstances change, as the air I breathe and my paradigms remain the same. There is nothing new contained within the Sun of a lost and dying age. There is nothing new contained within my thoughts of an undying anger and rage. The confusion is not real, as it is a mechanism designed to sterilize the fertilized womb. This is where regret, chastity, and morality go to slumber in the womb of their tomb. The blowing breeze still calls upon me. I can feel its chilling calls reverberate within my chest cavity. It is the mother’s voice, calling her children home. It is that specific nurturing feeling you know exists within your mind, but have yet to experience it within your heart. Within each incarnation, I search throughout the life I am currently inhabiting, in order to fill this illusive nurturing within my heart. I specifically reincarnate myself and travel from rebirth to rebirth, just to fill the voided hole, which lives deep within my blackened heart. After all of my travels through my incarnations, I am just now beginning to learn how to live with this void within my heart. It is not as bad as you might think it to be, as it has been Æons, since I have not felt pain within my heart. I have now fully come to the understanding in which the void I felt within my heart, no longer requires to be filled from any type of external nurturing. I always thought I needed some type of external fulfilment, but now I have come to the complete understanding, in which I am my own fulfilment, as I require nothing from outside of myself. Within each incarnation into this physical material realm, I am able to forge deeper into my consciousness; communing deeper into my consciousness’s internal nature.
G.G. Kalfas 